About a month ago, I fell in love. Head over heels in love. With a pair of shoes. Now normally, I would have clarified “no pun intended” after the head over heels comment, as well as after the title of the post (you’ll see why in a sec), but since finding my soulmate in a pair of shoes is so very Carrie Bradshaw, I might as well embrace her in all her punny greatness.
Del Toro #TheShit Loafer via ModaOperandi.com (not currently available)
Yup, that’s them. That pair of shoes completely stole my heart. Designers Edie Parker and Del Toro collaborated on an entire M’OTICONS collection of loafers and clutches. Sure I loved the see no evil, hear no evil monkeys, and that heart-eyed cats were near perfect, but something just clicked inside me when I saw those adorable poops staring up at me from a pretty dusty blue slipper. Love at first sight is real guys, it happened to me. And I didn’t even realize til later they were actually named #TheShit. I don’t know if it was the quirkiness or maybe the cuteness I had never notices on my tiny iPhone screen. Maybe there was a feeling of rebellion in spending $340 on a pair of glorified slippers with literally piles of crap on them.
But when you know, you know, and I knew. I wasn’t about to let true love slip between my fingertips. I didn’t want to be some old lady on her deathbed, looking back at her life and the one that got away. Preorder seems so long ago, but I guess minutes feel like hours and days feel like weeks when you’re waiting for the one you love. Like Billy Crystal said in When Harry Met Sally, when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.
They still haven’t arrived. It’s like I’m standing at the top of the Empire State Building waiting for them to come prove they love me to, but as each minute goes by, time starts feeling longer and I become less certain that I’ll ever see my loves again.
And while I am completely devoted to my one true love, that doesn’t mean I can’t look right? So let’s talk loafers (or smoking slippers, or whatever you want to call them). Raise your hand if you have a pair with a skull, or that looks like a dog or cat or mouse…..everyone raised their hand, right? If you didn’t, go check out Alexander McQueen, Charlotte Olympia, and Marc by Marc Jacobs. But heres the thing, there are s many edgier styles out there…let’s explore!
Left: Stubbs & Wootton College via StubbsandWootton.com
Right: Del Toro x Disney Pinocchio Embroidered Limited Edition Collaboration Slipper via DelToroShoes.com
I’ve wanted the “screw you” Stubbs for a while now. I think they’re fun because they’re edgy without being outright crude. Guys, I’m having a realization that maybe my dirty mouth is so out of control I want my shoes to scream obscenities as well…. oof. Oh well, another intervention for another time. The Pinocchio ones, on the other hand, are pretty darn innocent (oh get your mind out of the gutter, yes, you!), but still there is something very cool to them. They’re whimsical yet dark…. just like a smiling poop emoji! Anyway, there are tons more ranging from the expensive at Stubbs & Wootton and Del Toro to the much more affordable at Asos.com. Happy hunting! I’ll just be here, waiting for my true love to come!